Thank you so much for taking the time to take this quiz, the thing to remember is we are always a mix of different parenting strategies.
Your main parenting trait is
You put a lot of effort into creating and maintaining a positive relationship with your child.
You explain the reasons behind your rules.
You enforce rules and give consequences, but take your child's feelings into consideration.
If those statements sound familiar, you may be an authoritative parent. Authoritative parents have rules and they use consequences, but they also take their children's opinions into account. They validate their children's feelings, while also making it clear that the adults are ultimately in charge.
Authoritative parents invest time and energy into preventing behaviour problems before they start. They also use positive discipline strategies to reinforce positive behaviour, like praise and reward systems.
Researchers have found chidren who have authoritative parents are most likely to become responsible adults who feel comfortable expressing their opinions.
Children raised with authoritative discipline tend to be happy and successful. They're also more likely to be good at making decisions and evaluating safety risks on their own.
“Hell hath no fury like a toddler who’s sandwich was been cut into squares when they wanted triangles.”
01. Don't be so hard on yourself
You are going to loose your temper, you are going to run out of patience and you are not always going to spend the time rationalising why they need to stop at the road because you are a human and you do not have an infinite amount of patience!
The thing to remember is that losing your temper is ok
Shouting 'Because I said so' is ok
Not wanting to play Vets for the 15th billion time is ok!
When you lose your temper accept that is happened, I find saying sorry to my son really powerful as not only does it teach him that saying sorry is ok and normal, its shows him that I am only human, I get cross and that it is ok to have those feelings
It also helps to foster a more honest relationship as they grown older as they live in a world where feelings are a valid and talking about them is important.
You are an amazing mummy, you always have time for any question, worry, game of make believe. But that can come at a cost
"You cannot pour from an empty cup!"
So you need to carve out time for yourself and remember that it is not selfish to want to reconnect with who you are and (possibly more importantly) who you were!
I have a blog post all about self care and you can also download my free Self Care Bundle which helps you get a plan into place and keep track.
There are lots of things you can do to practice self care (going to the supermarket is not one though I have used it when I've been really desperate, especially if you find one with a clothes department!)
Bath with candles
Read a book (probably in the bath with the door locked if you have children!)
Book a massage
Go out for lunch by yourself
It is not selfish to what to spend time by yourself and it makes you are better and happier Mother.
Please download my Self Care Bundle and make a plan. Carve out time for yourself and remember that you are more than a mum and you deserve to be allowed that space to bring your A game to the parenting table
02. Me Time is not Selfish!
03. Pick Your Battles
Sometimes with all the will and calm reasoning in the world, your child is not going to wear the jumper you have picked out.
Do not take this as an opportunity to teach them compromise and that life does not always go the way you think and give it up and let them wear the batman onesie.
There is always another day and another battle!
"You're still a rockstar, I whisper to myself as I turn off Paw Patrol and get into bed at 9pm."
How The Mum Squad can help...
Hi my name is Anna and I am a mum, a step mum, a meal planner, appointment scheduler, fashion consultant, chief negotiator and full time lover of all things Chris Pratt.
Ok so the last thing probably isn't relevant but you get the picture.
I have spent the last 10 years negotiating the highs and lows of parenting in all its (often, and lets be honest, disgusting) glory!
I am a mum to a 4 year old boy and step mum to a 12 year old boy and 15 year old girl (they are the reason I know what snapchat and tiktok are!)
I have lived though everything from a week in the SCBU, baby led weaning (SO stressful and messy),the struggles of breastfeeding to everything a teenage girl bring to the mix (and it's not ending anytime soon!), negotiating a blended family and my genuine concerns around social media and the effect it is having on a generation that don't know a world without it.
I truly believe that your squad, tribe, women who will tell you its ok to get through bath time with prosecco on a Monday night are the people who get you through the mind numbingly boring and often totally SHIT moments of being a parent. They are your cheer squad and will be there for all the big and more often than not LITTLE wins!
They are your friends for life, your kindred spirits and your reality check (cos sometimes we need that too)